Tuesday, 20 May 2014

Poorly

Forgive me reader for it has been well over a week since my last blog post. I fully intended to keep to a more regular schedule for this so have made the conscious decision today to post a new blog every Tuesday and Friday and we'll see how that goes.

I do however have an excuse for not having written in a while and that is that I've been a little bit poorly. I've been to all manor of NHS avenues for advice and as far as they tell me I have strained my intercostal muscles. Sounds sexy right? Well, it isn't. Essentially it makes it nigh on impossible for me to take deep breaths so if I do something that leaves me even a little bit out of breath I am either in agony trying to breathe deeply or I hyperventilate and go into a panic attack. So, like I said, sexy it is not.

The problem is that I've been told by every doctor I've seen that I need to rest. Now resting is not something that comes very naturally to me and last week when the first doctor I saw told me I needed to rest I was back in work by the afternoon carrying on as normal. Now I work in a bank so it's not like I have the most strenuous job in the world but you never sit still for very long and there's plenty of stooping, lifting and whizzing around that you have to do. Especially if you go at a million miles and hour like I do. This behaviour does not constitute rest which is why I found myself in the A&E department at hospital yesterday terrified that I had a pulmonary embolism or was about to have a heart attack.

It's very much in my nature to panic about things anyway. So when on Sunday night I was massively sick, run to the bathroom sick, I immediately thought I was dying before I even looked at the NHS symptom checker app I have on my tablet. I went through the app answering all of the questions diligently and honestly and when I got to the end it told me to dial 999.

Suffice to say I did not dial 999. I didn't feel like a 999 sort of case. So instead I rolled over and cuddled my husband for a little bit until it got too unbearably warm and then rolled back to try and get to sleep. Sleep, however, did not want to play. I found myself tossing and turning and trying not to be sick again which I managed until the morning.

I phoned my manager and explained I wasn't going to be in and then I phoned my Mum in tears. I was absolutely convinced that something was really wrong with me because no matter how I tried to answer the questions on the app I had to either phone 999 or go to A&E. My Mum was remarkably calm even though we share the same panic gene and told me to rest and to try and get an appointment at my doctors which I couldn't because they are rubbish.

As I lied in bed the pain in my chest started to get worse so I had no option but to dial 111. I genuinely believe this service is exemplary because the lady I spoke to was very calm and understanding and even called me back when I cancelled the call with my cheek.

The people at A&E were also marvellous and I was seen very quickly even though the waiting area was crammed with people all in varying degrees of distress. Observations were taken, I had an ECG and had to pee in a pot but all my results were perfectly normal. The very doctor I saw said that she was convinced it was a muscular and skeletal problem and I just needed to take it easy. She also said that there was lots of self care information online and that I should look for some further care information there. She went on to remind me that by take it easy she meant really take it easy and to not go back to work for at least a couple of days or until my breathing started to get a little easier.

I looked online and some sources say I should have at least two days bed rest. I tried to bed rest today but it just doesn't suit me. I did stay in bed until lunch time and then go back to bed after lunch though so maybe that's close enough.

I'm trying to rest I really am. I'll have to see in the morning if work is a possibility but at this point it really doesn't seem likely. I need to give myself time to recover and not run before I can walk and associated other clichés.

Until next time.

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